Hudson has been taking a step or two here and there.  He stands alone for quite a while and then he gets so proud of himself that he flaps his arms as fast as he can and starts to fall forward, which is when the steps come in.  They're more of an oops, how do I not fall forward save himself sort of step.  Yesterday he took several steps with Lucia, his nanny.  I guess that's how it starts.  First they take one step, which turns into a handful of steps and before you blink they're walking.

We go on walks several times a week and I often think about how I want to start running again, but there's no way I can run like I used to.  I haven't ran since I was like five or six months preggo.  So, I continue to tell myself the story that I'm too out of shape to run and that I have to start lifting weights or something to build up my strength and then I can start running again.  Only then will I be able to get back into running.  Of course, I have every excuse in the book that prevents me from taking the elevator down five floors to get to our weight room.  (or better yet I could WALK down five flights of stairs!).  It's no wonder I don't run, I have all kinds of alibis.  

I had an epiphany on our walk this morning.  Hudson, like most babies, learns to walk by cruising around furniture, standing alone, taking one step, then three steps, etc. and finally one day he'll be running full speed ahead.  That's when it hit me that I don't have to set out to run for 30 minutes.  I don't have to wait until I'm "strong enough" to run like I used to.  Just take baby steps.  I can start running right now, today, even if it's only five minutes.  Or three minutes.  Just run already, damn it!

I ran this morning.  I ran for 20 minutes and I took a few walk breaks in between.  It felt so invigorating.  So this is what it feels like to have my heart rate up again?!  I have to say, the caffeine helped.  Oh how I've missed my caffeine.

It's so easy to delay today what we can put off until tomorrow, especially when we have all kinds of seemingly-acceptable excuses.  I often do it out of fear of failure, but I have to remind myself that running three minutes versus 30 minutes isn't a failure - it's a success. Three minutes is more than I've ran in months.  Celebrate your successes, no matter how small they may feel.  Whether it's running or writing or cooking, just begin with baby steps.  After all, we have to walk before we can run.  

About a year ago Jamie gave me a gift of piano lessons to take whenever I wanted.  Or, whenever I made time.  I still haven't made the time.  But, about a month ago I told him that I have changed my mind, and I wanted to trade in my piano lessons for swim lessons.  I don't know how to swim.  I know how to get myself from one end of the pool to the other without drowning, but I've never learned *how* to swim.  Watching me swim is painful to any onlooker.  It's about as entertaining to watch as it is watching Jamie snowboard down the mountain.  Flailing arms and legs, completely out of control and barely staying afloat.  

About two weeks ago I was telling a girlfriend how much Hudson loves his swim class, and how I would really like to take swim lessons and become a strong swimmer.  About one week ago, Jamie was given an opportunity to take a Total Immersion intensive swim course this week in Coronado, (http://www.totalimmersion.net/), but he has to work, so I get to take the course in his place.  Lucky me!  I got what I asked for in less than one month's time; not a bad turn-around time.  And I don't believe it had anything to do with "luck".  I set my intention on swimming lessons, and I put it out to the universe.  

This is not the first time I've set an intention and then watched it pop up in my life.  (Stay tuned for part two of setting your intentions for the most amazing story of getting exactly what I asked for).  The universe is filled with energy, and when you set an intention and hold it in your mind, that energy moves you in the direction that you want to go.  I know, some of you are thinking - energy, c'mon?!  Don't take my word for it, give it a try. Set an intention for something small, but something you don't see showing up in your life every day.  A ladybug, or a purple ball.  Be as specific as you can and then hold your intention in your mind until you see it.  Keep your eyes open, you've likely already seen it, but we're rarely present enough in the moment to really see what our eyes are looking at.   

As a new mom, my eyes are not only always on Hudson, but my thoughts are as well.  It's sometimes hard to even know what it is that I want anymore, much less to ask for it. I often get wrapped up in Hudson's world and my new life of being a mom that I forget what I, Michelle Mitchell, wants or enjoys outside of being a mom.  My swim lessons are Monday through Friday this week and it's really the first time I've done something completely for myself in nine months.  It feels great to be checking back in to my needs and wants for a change.  

It's far too easy to get fully wrapped up into my baby's world, which is why I have to pencil in time to ask myself what brings me joy  and then set my intentions accordingly.  Just as I've said in prior blogs, I know that I am a much better mommy when I do things for myself and enjoy life as an adult!  Hudson completely approves of mommy taking care of herself so that she can show up more fully when she spends time with him.